Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Close Encounters

One summer as a kid I was best friends with Glenn Close's nephew. We went to the same summer camp and we bonded over our fondness for Blue Yoshi (because he could fly, thus making him the best Yoshi). Glenn co-owned a coffee shop in town with her sister Jessie. I'd seen her a couple times downtown, but I never spoke to her until I inadvertently made friends with her nephew.

I was invited to a family picnic at his house, and Glenn showed up with a big bag of homemade cookies. She took one out and offered it to me.

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That was the first and last time I spoke to Glenn Close.

One thing's certain: Helen Mirren wouldn't offer me no fucking oatmeal raisin cookie, that's for sure.

76 comments:

  1. Oh noes! The last 2 pictures aren't showing up :(

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  2. If only it had been chocolate chip... the possibilities could have been endless!

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  3. Glenn Close kinda looks like Conan O'brien

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  4. yeah the last two pics aren't showing. plzfix :(

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  5. Yeah, the bottom two pictures aren't showing up for me either. :( But...I love oatmeal raisin cookies. :P

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  6. Marry me? I would never make you raisin oatmeal cookies.

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  7. Celebrities have no idea how to be social with normal people. Any normal person would have known you bring chocolate chip or M&M cookies to a picnic.

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  8. How dare Glen Close offer you a cookie. She should be ashamed of herself.

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  9. you've some psycho fans dude....

    and yeah, no pics are showing... o.o

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  10. oh! nvm, i went to the main blog page and i can see it now... LMAO.

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  11. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  12. Helen Mirren beats Glenn Close in a cool contest any day of the week.

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  13. Yay they're working! <3

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  14. Can't believe you met Cruella De Vil and she offered you a cookie.

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  15. Damn you oatmeal raisin cookies. I always get excited thinking you're chocolate chip but alas it's you nasty oatmeal raisin.

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  16. The expressions are hilarious, also raisin oatmeal cookies? Seriously? Sounds like it came straight from hell!

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  17. I apply this situation to my favorite line from Ghostbusters::If someone asks you if you're a god, you say yes! so....

    If Glenn Close offers you a cookie, you say yes!

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  18. Of course the Blue Yoshi is the best Yoshi!!!!!! I think the worst Yoshi is the yellow one. Who cares if you can stomp really hard? Ugh. Waste of time.

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  19. :( I wish this post was longer. I love reading your stuff. <3

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  20. For some reason all the gender assignments in that post in combination with Glenn's clearly male name got me quite confused. Damn her.
    Funny as hell though, you rock.

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  21. Do you make lots of money? Because you should. Because you're so very funny. So very. And with the art. It's like... the stuff that is on tv. Animated. On the cartoon network. Or one of those comedy channels, late at night... yea. You're famous.

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  22. At least she didn't boil a rabbit on your stove....

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  23. Blue Yoshi is TOTALLY the best Yoshi!

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  24. Amazing story! You totally captured Glenn.

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  25. BEST EVER. I love the one-eye reappearance after you think she's gone.

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  26. I laughed.
    My drink fell out of my mouth.

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  27. Maybe should you juste all shut up lol GLENN CLOSE BEATS MIRREN
    Glenn is the best actress and im buyest coz shes also hotter... sorry

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  28. Yeah, late to this boat I am. But this means you grew up in bozo. I spent most of my college years in that coffee shop along with cactus records. Yay for wasting my education dollars!

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